If you find this alluring, you’re in LUCK!
It’s been another whopper of a week over in the buzzing Interestment HQ. So busy, in fact, that we haven’t been able to do our weekly feature for the grown up gossip site Hecklerspray. But the BIG NEWS is that we’ll be guest editing Hecklerspray for an ENTIRE WEEK, starting on Monday. Hence, like Bruno in Fame, we shall be typing Interestment with one hand, and Hecklerspray with the other. Do visit both, please, if only to see how we’re getting on. Should be interesting.
In other news, the Celebrity Clownface site is up, running, and in desperate need of contributions. We have another COMEDY NIGHT taking place on October 2nd in South London. You can find out more about that here, or reserve tickets by sending an email to [email protected].
And that’s about it. We have also been listening to this record A LOT. It’s a good Autumn/Winter track…
New Madonna in classic Madonna antics
Nothing tells the world that you’ve arrived quite like taking your clothes off and allowing the general public to cast a judgemental eye over your naked body. Madonna famously did it with the metal encased coffee table book, Sex, which featured her showing her boobs to Vanilla Ice, french kissing Naomi Campbell, and sitting seductively on top of a very nervous R2-D2. It was hugely popular at the time. And now, Lady GaGa – the oiky New York princess who appears to have stamped her foot and demanded pop stardom – has turned up on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine wearing nothing but some very convieniently placed bubbles, which cleverly hide both of her breasts, her strange belly button, and her lady gaga. The picture is accompanied by a headline reading The Rise of Lady GaGa, when they could easily have punned something along the lines of living in a bubble, or bubbles bursting, or desperate measures. But they chose not to. Good for them. Good for them.
In other news, Kylie Minogue might be getting married to someone. It’s her birthday by the way. And Rihanna – the pretty young singer with the nasty ex-boyfriend – has proved that she’s past the worst of it by looking sexy in a music video. One showbiz journalist in particular is delighted about that. Absolutely delighted. Here she is back in the good old days…
Eric Clapton Shreds
Well, Hugh Hefner turns 83 today, and no one could ever accuse him of not having a type. The Hef has bedded scores of women in those years, absolutely all of them identical, with freshly shampooed hair, oily legs, and groin tattoos. It’s just the way he likes them. Today, he’s probably got two or three lined up. Even so, we thought we should get him a present, so we headed to a nearby wasteland, pointed guns at one another, and argued loudly about what to get him until the sun came up. It boiled down to a toss up between an actual rabbit for the mansion, or a brilliantly overdubbed clip of Eric Clapton playing the guitar. In the end we got him both. Happy Sexy Birthday Hef!
One day, we will all be the same…
It’s always a pleasure to hear from one of the growing stock of Interestment contributors, and today magnificent observer of society, Emily, has turned her attention to the hot potato of sexual equality. She had this to say…
Saucy Golfer Henrik Stenson set pulses racing yesterday by stripping down to his bare essentials during the opening round of the WGC-CA Championship. I think it had something to do with the ball going in the water or something, but frankly I was just gazing at his buttocks. And while many females in the public eye find it hard to keep their vestments on, it was a duly refreshing change to see a scantily clad man who isn’t Keith Chegwin or Atlas from Gladiators.
It made me think. Is there equality between the sexes?
No, but if there was it would look a little like this:
1. As well as Nuts – a magazine full of pictures of women’s boobs – there would be a magazine called Boobs… full of pictures of men’s nuts.
2. Blokes would wear skin-tight outfits and then feel insecure when builders didn’t notice them.
3. Teenage boys would stop and ask grannies for their number in the street.
4. Men would begrudgingly watch netball in the pub with their girlfriend and all her mates.
5. Pubescent boys who didn’t shave their armpits wouldn’t have any friends at school.
6. Men would admit to actually liking soya milk.
7. Girls would take three quarters of an hour to do a poo.
8. ITV would make a sitcom about two quite disappointing women (probably played by Caroline Quentin and Leslie Ash) which would later get a post-watershed slot on the BBC and go on to become one of their most successful shows ever.
9. Comediennes would not be judged on how ugly they are before they’ve even told a joke.
10. Your pervy Aunt would try it on with your 20-year-old brother’s mates.