The Doors, Hello I Love You
Wowzers trousers, the week is hurtling along, we’re already at Thursday. Beautiful Thursday. Beautiful sexy Thursday. Site regulars will have packed an overnight bag, brimming with chocolate spread, rose petals, a couple of Kenny Loggins records, some Lynx, a tub of softening margarine, and about three condoms. It’s going to be a wild ride tonight, alright, make no mistake about that. To get you in the mood, here’s Jim Morrison and his pop group, The Doors, demonstrating just the right words to say to a stranger, if you want to have it off with them.
Kenny Loggins, This Is It
Excellent, Thursday, the sexiest day of the week. To get in the mood, remove your shirt/blouse, slide into a soft silky bath robe, and allow a sweet summer breeze to dance between your thighs. Then listen to Kenny Loggins, as he explains that sometimes you’ve just got to grab love by the balls.
Is there any better feeling?
Music, don’t underestimate the power of it. It can make people do strange things. For example, next time you’re rowing with your life partner about a lost set of keys, have someone cue up a love song like Lady in Red – within seconds you’ll be a smoking heap on a moist living room floor. Similarly, if you’re being mugged by a gang of hoodies, just start humming some classic Sean Paul riffs. They’ll be so lost in the music, they’ll completely forget to stab you. But far greater than either of those examples are the songs that bring out a gentleman’s inner high school jock – the ones that make your boss want to share an enthusiastic high five with you. These are the four best, as pointed out by friend of the site and excellent maker of comments, Spencer…
1. Herbie Hancock, Rockit
Something about the scratching, the electric beats and the simple synth make this song excellent for high fiving. It’s also the kind of track that grown men are convinced they can breakdance to. They often can’t, but can make up for it by going for a double high five with the nearest recipient – it’s a move also known as the “high ten”. That’s how good this song is.
2. Kenny Loggins, Danger Zone
Forever linked with Top Gun, this song would be equally brilliant without the film. It’s got the word “danger” in it, there are about a million guitars power riffing at any one time, and Loggins is literally career peaking throughout. In fact, just thinking about it makes you want to run down the street pumping your fist and high fiving old women in shops.
3. Devo, Whip It
Cleverly, these art rockers from America included a whipping sound in this track. Anyone familiar with high fiving knows that when done to perfection, the connection makes exactly the same noise as a whip being cracked. Hence, the subliminal messages in this song demand that you slap hands. Absolutely demand it.
4. Fleetwood Mac, Don’t Stop
A song that celebrates the joy of the moment, just hearing the opening chord makes you want to start frantically high fiving anyone you can lay your hands on. In that sense, it’s a very dangerous track.
Smooth music goes heavy for Kenny Loggins.
What a fool believes
For those uninitiated into the world of Yacht Rock, this is the best possible starting point. It’s a great internet comedy that’s been doing the rounds for the last year or so. Stay tuned for more episodes…