When award winning speeches go RIGHT

Watch and learn Hollywood types!

It’s the Oscars at the weekend, and it’ll stick to the usual rhythm. Celebrities arrive looking good enough to shag, they then pile into a tremendous auditorium with glued smiles on their faces. They then act their bollocks off to pretend they’re not bored out of their minds as some dumb fuck lighting director trundles through an endless list of names. Then the actors get back-slapped, start weeping, earnestly thank Jesus, then go through their giant boring list of names. It’s rubbish. Above is Mickey Rourke turning convention on its head and grinding its face into the dirt.

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