Showbusiness: Lopez stumble, Jordan’s strop, WAG in pants…

Bad dream comes true…


Nothing is more hilarious than watching someone fall over. Unless it’s fatal. Then it’s only funny for about ten seconds. But watching someone attempting to style out a pavement tumble, by lurching forward with their face literally inches from concrete, their legs clumsily attempting to lift them out of trouble, can provide some of life’s richest, most wonderful moments. It’s the exact point at which we stop being people, and become animals – bone headed, panicking animals. We love a stumble. And the latest famous person to quench our lustful thirst for slapstick humiliation is the actress/singer Jennifer Lopez, who managed to balls up a daring dance move at the American Music Awards, which saw her crashing down onto her world famous posterior. As expected, showbiz desks all around the country have been overheard screaming in fits of laughter, watching the clip over and over again. For the first time in years, Lopez is almost one of us.

In other extremely important celebrity news, Frank Lampard’s ex-girlfriend Elen Rives has been photographed wearing just her underpants and a bra. And Jordan has stomped out of the I’m A Celebrity… jungle, insisting that she just misses her children. Young Harvey will presumably be very touched by mummy’s obvious lie.


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