Not including this weird woman…
Horror films, they’re a mixed bag. Some can be so terrifying that the mere mention of them can drain the colour from a man’s face and dampen the underarms of his shirt. Even now, certain members of the Interestment family would be aggressively disagreeable if locked in a room and forced to endure The Shining, and anyone who’s ever attempted The Blair Witch Project whilst naked in a basement will attest to a very creepy experience. But them some horror films are just stupid – like those ones about the Cabbage Patch Kids eating people or something. Anyway, the best horror films manage to terrify you to the very core, and yet send a warm sensation dancing through your underpants thanks to some very sensual casting. Some wonderful women have aroused us during gore-fests over the years, including the horror great Caroline Munro, an Italian called Asia Argento, and even that little Australian woman, Naomi Watts. Yet, none of them make our top four, which reads thusly….
1. Britt Ekland, The Wicker Man
Not the interesting remake with Nic Cage, we mean the one where Britt Ekland plays Willow, a sexy little thing who really gives Edward Woodward, um, wood. For those who haven’t seen it, it’s a fucked up masterpiece about weirdos in fox heads being all creepy, but Ekland’s great looks cut through the mounting tension like you wouldn’t believe. In real life she was once married to Peter Sellers, she went out with Rod Stewart when he was still cool, and Roman Polanski wanted her to play the lead in Rosemary’s Baby instead of Mia Farrow. What a gorgeous Swede.
2. Jenny Agutter, An American Werewolf in London
Agutter will always be a massive Interestment favourite, thanks to her role as a Sexy Nurse Number One in An American Werewolf in London. Here a short synopsis: when a couple of American students visit some Limey pub and end up on the receiving end of a hungry Yorkshire wolf, awkwardness ensues. And at one point Agutter basically gets them out.
3. Rose McGowan, Planet Terror
McGowan is making a name for herself on the horror scene, having started out getting the serial killer treatment in Scream, then playing some kind of witch or soothsayer in a US show called Charmed, and finally moving on to her tour de force as a stripper with a gun-leg in Planet Terror – one half of the Tarantino/Rodriquez Grindhouse mash-up. No doubt about it, she’s one heck of a gal. Awooga!
4. Ingrid Pitt, Countess Dracula
A horror LEGEND, Pitt has starred in films called: Sound of Horror, The House that Dripped Blood, The Vampire Lovers, Countess Dracula, and a non-horror called Nobody Ordered Love, which sounds excellent. A strong, sensual, frightening woman, she also – like Ekland – appeared nude in The Wicker Man. Although in her case it was actually her.
Of course, it would be unfair to bestow such wonderful horror legends on the boys without a little something for the girls. Below is Peter Cushing.