X Factor: Afro man, and tragedy!

Published: 2nd Sep, 2009

Bisexual Danyl’s biggest rival

Jamie Afro

On X Factor, they know how to really push the envelope on the glam stakes. Firstly, they’ve ditched the stuffy studio to involve a massive jeering audience from the off. And secondly, the judges now seem incapable of traveling the country in a sensible manner. They’ve taken to getting across London by speedboat, helicoptering through Birmingham, and it’s surely only a matter of time before Simon decides that the only sane way to get to Glasgow would be by rocket. The message is clear, judges – you are powerful people. Not like us normal folk.

Sadly, this week was again lacking in normals. There was a man who only auditioned because he was “guided by angels.” The same angels that instructed him to sing Erasure. Were they perhaps gay, these angels? He didn’t get through. Neither did the weirdo with the beard whose “musical roots are in karaoke”. That’s a bit like saying that you learnt everything about cooking by visiting Aldi. And The Stunners made the cruel audience sit back and guffaw because neither of them were remotely good looking. Their biggest mistake was to inform the audience that they were “really good”, before immediately letting everyone down by being horrible singers. From now on, they’d be wise to say “we’re really bad” before gigs. Just an idea.

Of the ones that got through, everyone’s been going bonkers about Jamie, the guy with the massive Jackson Five afro. According to his interview with Dermot O’Leary, he’s liked music since he was 10, and now he’s 33. That means he’s liked music for 23 years! No wonder his rocked out version of Kings of Leon was so impressive. He’s liked music for ages! Here at Interestment, we’ve only liked music for 12 years. The girl from Trinidad was very impressive. The Jazz singing girl band, Misfits, put on a performance guaranteed to muster the full Cowell erection. And Daryl the cabinet maker responded to a simple “how are you?” question with a detailed description of his brother’s death from the dreaded cancer. We never did find out how he was. He did, however, provide the quote of the night with: “hopefully my voice will do the talking.”

Great stuff.

Josh Burt
About the author:

Josh has been a writer and journalist for the best part of twenty years and has written for modern staples like FHM and Cosmopolitan and The Daily Telegraph and The Sun. He has also written a small handful of so-so books that you can still buy.

2 Responses to X Factor: Afro man, and tragedy!

  1. mustard says:

    If the bisexual guy and the one with the afro joined forces they would form a superduo. They would be the new oasis – England’s gift of music to the world. SOMEBODY TELL COWELL.

  2. Luisa B. says:

    Jamie es LA VOZ… Tiene talento natural, creatividad para “sellar” las canciones que interpreta magistralmente…mejor que los originales? Tiene una presencia escénica increíble y un encanto y carisma que se le desborda… Y para mejorar un AFRO que me aloca!!!!!! Saludos Peru

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