Big Brother 10: The madness continues!

Published: 18th Aug, 2009

FYI, does not like surprises…

Bea

Oh dear, it’s all gone really wrong for Bea. The hippy festival goer who entered the house has now developed such thin skin that if the metaphor were to come to life, we’d all be dry puking at the site of her various organs spluttering and pulsating through a fine layer of fleshy tracing paper. Thankfully, we are speaking figuratively. But even so, her spiky personality has led to fights with Charlie for playfully gobbing a mouthful of water into her sneering face, Rodrigo for daring to laugh at her, and Big Brother for treating her to a kind surprise, but not making it the surprise that she’d have asked for. One suspects that on hearing the wall of boos that greet her when she gets the boot, she’ll begin berating the audience, bellowing about how flabbergasted she is by their actions, and how she would NEVER boo anyone, and has never booed anyone IN HER LIFE. A genuinely terrifying, tetchy woman.

Elsewhere in the house, Rodrigo flips between the bath and the pool, rarely enjoying dry land. David‘s friends think he’s “doing a great job” – of what exactly, we’re not sure. Being a chubby simpleton? Siavash asked out loud “how can anyone not know what Stevie Wonder looks like?” blissfully missing the irony lacing the very question he’d just asked. And the ghost of Kris told Sophie to remember what he’d written on the palm of her hand on the day he was evicted from the house, which we suspect means that she should probably seriously consider having a coil fitted.

Siavash = still number one.

Josh Burt
About the author:
Josh has been a writer and journalist for the best part of twenty years and has written for modern staples like FHM and Cosmopolitan and The Daily Telegraph and The Sun. He has also written a small handful of so-so books that you can still buy.

2 Responses to Big Brother 10: The madness continues!

  1. lora says:

    She is such a mentalist
    An Actress
    And a Countess (take out an o)
    All she talks about is how “genuinely” upset she is
    “I genuinely am shocked/upset/horrified” etc
    There is nowt genuine about her.
    She’s as genuine Pammys boobs, or as my sobriety.
    It’s like when people say “I’m not being funny but…”
    You know that the next part of the sentence someone is going to be “funny”
    Sophie to win, cos she is piling on the timber and busting out of her clothes, I love a good fat story. Hopefully they will roll her out of there like Verucca Salt.
    Umpa Lumpa baby

  2. alan says:

    What a Beatch – I am yet to see one tear roll down her cheeks as yet but she makes all the sounds as though she is crying – how do you do that? With that said, we must keep her in.

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