Showbusiness: Lipstick, old women, bisexuals

Published: 13th Jul, 2009

One of these is a bisexual gentleman…

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If you’ve managed even a few moments of this year’s excellent edition of Big Brother, you might have noticed that The Bisexual Club is growing faster than the ever-expanding oozing death machine in The Blob. Kids on Facebook have twigged that double-gender sex can at least double the friends list, while all the latest pop stars and actresses like to remind the world as often as possible that their sexual desires are so complex and far out that you may as well just call them bisexual and be done with it. It’s wild, and showbusiness offices all over the capital have come to resemble Turkish steam rooms, after hard day after hard day of breaking bisexuality news. The latest of which concerns Duncan from Blue, a pouting ice dancer who thought that he needed to come out and tell the world that he sometimes does it with men. It was a move akin to OJ Simpson saying that he might have once killed a woman. Duncan went on to explain that he still likes breasts, so girls are in with a crack too. One celebrity journalist in particular appeared to think that this was big news.

In other magnificent showbusiness news, Demi Moore (below with Cameron Diaz) has left swathes of highly paid reporters agog by wearing a bikini on holiday and not looking totally disgusting, even though she’s like 60 or something. And Cheryl Cole has completely humiliated herself by accidentally getting a smudge of lipstick on her teeth. Triple cringe!

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Josh Burt
About the author:

Josh has been a writer and journalist for the best part of twenty years and has written for modern staples like FHM and Cosmopolitan and The Daily Telegraph and The Sun. He has also written a small handful of so-so books that you can still buy.

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