Petrifying fashion news for eyes

Published: 19th Jan, 2009

Prepare to be confused…


If there’s one thing that fools the basic human eye like nothing else, it’s stripes. Such is the warped complexity of the average retina, that anything with horizontal or vertical lines draped over an adult body sends them into an insane tizzy. They can no longer work out the usual shape of someone – are they really thinner than they appear? Or fatter? It’s all too much, and unfortunately for your baby blues, the throbbing craniums that rule the fashion roost have decided that it’s time to bring back stripy tops. We’re all going to be wearing them, and, judging by the rumours, horizontal is the way to go – a style that famously makes fat people look like they’ve had a hula hooping accident. So, stock up friends. Get striping!

You heard it here first. Or, like, twentieth.

Josh Burt
About the author:
Josh has been a writer and journalist for the best part of twenty years and has written for modern staples like FHM and Cosmopolitan and The Daily Telegraph and The Sun. He has also written a small handful of so-so books that you can still buy.

One Response to Petrifying fashion news for eyes

  1. Avatar pat pope says:

    are zebras white with black stripes……….or the other?

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