Interestment’s New Year Resolutions revealed

Published: 2nd Jan, 2009

It’s going to be intense, 2009

yeti

Well, we pretty much messed up all of the promises we made to ourselves in 2008. There are no visible abdominal muscles, there isn’t anything in the savings account, and The Yeti (pictured) is still out there, hunting down people to eat. He should be dead, damn it. Hence, we decided that this year we’d keep it reasonable, and in amongst the giving up coffee after 10pm, and no cheese before lunch, were these four promises:

1. We must watch this film

It’s called Skatetown USA, it’s about rollerskating, romance on wheels, disco music. It stars Bugsy Malone and Patrick Swayze, and it’s described as “the greatest story ever rolled”. A must, then.

2. We must read this book

homicide

Without The Wire to look forward to, it might be high time to pick up a book and start reading. This is by the same guy who wrote The Wire, and by all accounts it’s supposed to be excellent. Martin Amis described it as “a masterpiece”, and he wrote Money – one of the best books around.

3. We must watch more of this show

come-dine-with-me1

There is nothing more thrilling than watching a passive aggressive dinner party guest attempting to quash their fury, brought about because their host has just served them a DELICIOUS pudding. How dare they. Random strangers cooking each other dinner – it shouldn’t work, but it completely does. The best reality show on telly.

4. We must learn to forgive these people

It’s not often that we take a dislike to someone for no reason, but whilst watching a spot of Sky plussed Jools Holland, the above performance took place, and a swell of rage pushed against our guts. They’re just so annoying, but we WILL learn to love this band. Even if it kills us.

Josh Burt
About the author:

Josh has been a writer and journalist for the best part of twenty years and has written for modern staples like FHM and Cosmopolitan and The Daily Telegraph and The Sun. He has also written a small handful of so-so books that you can still buy.

4 Responses to Interestment’s New Year Resolutions revealed

  1. Awry says:

    Her from the Ting Tings has an extraordinary pair of teeth and him from the Ting Tings always ALWAYS has sunglasses on. They both fill me with suspicion.

  2. Rich says:

    My Dad likes the Ting Tings. Problem.

  3. Mark says:

    The Dizzy Rascal version of “That’s not my name” is pretty good. Or I should say is bear good.

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